No, Governor Cuomo, I Won’t “Like” You On Facebook

Dear Governor Cuomo,

Just got my invitation via email to “like” you, despite the fact that you are thoroughly unlikeable by all accounts. Now, I was marginally okay with having a bullying hard-ass in my political corner for a change from all that namby-pambe Harry Reid/Barack Obama politesse. But not if it means I’m going to have flammable water so you can get elected president.

I’m not happy with you, dude, not the least of which because I’ve had to spend my summer attending upside-down town council meetings where the elders banned cigarette smoking within fifty feet of the new town hall at the same time they had a gas lobbyist redraft the town’s zoning laws to welcome mining rigs.

Also, I hear from first-hand sources that you’re an over-weeningly ambitious bullying asshole. The kind who threatens people into doing what you want; like, putting your name on the ballot or else. And craps on people that haven’t properly kissed your ring.

Andrew Cuomo, I knew your father. He was a Facebook friend of mine. And you are no Mario Cuomo.

So, no, I’m not going to ever like you. On Facebook or anywhere else.

PS. You’re dead to me!

Yours, Allison

4 comments

  1. Meredith L.’s avatar

    *sheepishly raising hand*

    Gay marriage?

    *ducking*

  2. JR’s avatar

    me, too. dead to me.

  3. allison’s avatar

    Well, you can have your big, fat gay wedding but don’t try to go locavore.

  4. Danielle’s avatar

    I like Cuomo.

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