homemaking

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Bad Breeder: Parent Of The Day

June 27, 2011 in breastfeeding, cops, Family-Friendly, homemaking, marriage, Parenting, Real Housewives | 1 comment

And today’s BB Medal of Valour goes to…the Ohio broad who tried to head off arresting officers by spraying them with breastmilk.

Ha (snort). My husband looked up from Wimbledon/work for that.

Yes, the Daily News reports…

An Ohio woman attempted to fight off police trying to remove her from her car by spraying them with her breast milk, authorities said. Stephanie Robinette got into a fight with her husband while attending a wedding at the Bridgewater Banquet & Conference Center in the city of Delaware.

“When deputies attempted to remove Robinette from the vehicle, she advised the deputies that she was a breast-feeding mother,” said Sheriff Walter L. Davis III.

As deputies went to restrain her, he said, Robinette “proceeded to remove her right breast from her dress and began spraying deputies and the vehicle with her breast milk.”

Additional deputies arrived and eventually pried her from the car before placing her under arrest.

I love everything about this story .

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Real Housewife of Park Slope: Happy NOW???

June 15, 2011 in homemaking, housekeeping, Park Slope, Real Housewives | Permalink

Good housekeeping. I’m getting death threats about the precipitous decline in mine.

Can’t my people see that this blogging crap is important and time-consuming? Fine, I haven’t made as much in the last two years as I made working a month at KFC in 9th grade but I’m building something here. You know????

Uh, not so much.

In my capacity as housekeeper and domestic management consultant, I’ve now bought your GD TP and other luxury items (fine, food), I’ve scrubbed your pissed-upon toilet seats (nice aim, boys), I’ve cleaned, mopped, vacuumed and even started defrosting something for dinner. Additionally, I’ve made breakfasts and lunches (and thank you for all the crumbs on the couch). Oh, yeah, I oiled the granite countertop you finally installed after TEN LONNNNNNG YEARS leaning behind the couch and am now moving on to the room-sized clot of unfolded clean clothes.

So, thank you very much and buzz the fuck off, you ungrateful wretches.

Also… where’s my RHOPS? Consider this a casting call.

 

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