I swear to god, I thought this whole Weinergate story was a hoax. For one, what a fucking idiot you would have to be for this story to be true. It’s just hard to fathom this kind of stupidity. And if your name happens to be WEINER, it’s just, just, just beyond my limited comprehension.
Right up until Weiner opened his mouth, I was with him—although admittedly relieved that Park Slope does not fall within his district as originally suspected. And, even then, it took a while for the BS detector to fully kick in and the non-denial denials to wear down my faith.
Because, let’s face it, how many male politicians have to get caught with the zipper down before the rest get the idea that this kind of shit NEVER ends well?
Between Arnold, DSK and Spitzer and the wide stance guy and the one who was supposed to be hiking the Appalachian trail, and Clinton, and Newt and, oh yeah, John Edwards, and the Craig’s List Congressman… WHAT NUMBER ARE WE CURRENTLY AT?
Do we really need some sort of poliperv sex scandal clock hung up in Times Square to keep a tally?
And Weiner was fortunate to land the wife he’s got. He’s lucky he’s EVER gotten laid. By the way, didn’t they just get married?
But then came the news today: via Gawker via Radar Online…
Here’s a new picture of a bare-chested Anthony Weiner, which a young woman says he emailed her on May 20, 2011. If you look closely, you can see Weiner and his wife, Huma Abedin, cuddling in a picture in the background.
In addition to this snapshot of Weiner’s toned torso (does Weiner wax?), he allegedly sent the woman the same grey underwear dick pic that appeared on his Twitter account, and another picture that is “extremely graphic, and leaves nothing to the imagination.”
Big Government, which posted the picture, reports that a search for the Yahoo! email address Weiner used to send it brings up a Yahoo! profile that seems to be chock-full of topless pics. You’d think politicians would have put a moratorium on topless sexts, so soon after Rep. Chris Lee was undone by his Craigslist trolling. Is there something inherent to congressmen that make them take shirtless pictures of themselves, or does the office drive them to it? Something to think about as we enter what appears to be a new, terrifying era of topless lawmakers.
Radar Online, meanwhile, reports that another woman claims to have “200 sexually explicit messages from Weiner’s Facebook profile.” Including this one about his hard-on: “It wont go away. and now im taking pics of it. making me harder still.” We’re going to say that Weiner’s story that he’s the victim of a hack is, at best, lacking some pertinent details. Weiner is reportedly scheduled to address the media at 4pm.
Can’t wait to hear that presser. Just a few more questions:
- Can we blame this on Viagra?
- Where are the horny women sinners? What’s Madeline Albright been up to????
- WTF was Weiner thinking?
- Why, Weiner? Why?
When will they ever learn? When will they eh-ever learn?